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Don’t play the excuse game
If you often fail to deliver what is expected of you, read on for tips on how to stop giving justifications and start showing results
Do you have an excuse or a justification ready every time you
don’t do something that you were supposed to? People who make excuses lose the
respect and trust of their friends, family and colleagues. While there are
people who have a genuine reason for not being able to deliver what is asked of
them, there are the other lot who just make up classic excuses on every
occasion, just to avoid taking responsibility for what they have failed to do.
You know your excuses have become a problem if someone confronts you about it,
even in a joking manner. You will start to be known as someone who breaks
promises, places the blame on others, or doesn’t accept responsibility for
actions or errors. Read on for tips on how you stop being the “excuse guy or
girl” and become more reliable.
Acknowledge the problem
The first step to solving any problem is the fact that you need to acknowledge
that there is a problem. Don’t live in denial thinking it will go away
eventually, making excuses is like any bad habit such as smoking or being an
alcoholic, the approach should be “yes I have a problem” and then after you
recognise the problem, find solutions.
Take responsibility
People who make excuses all the time, at some level do so because they do not
want the responsibility of accepting the blame, if anything goes wrong. They
live under the illusion that everyone is out to get them and, therefore, are
always paranoid. You need to get over yourself and stop thinking that the whole
world is out to victimise you. Instead, ensure that whatever responsibility you
have been given is done with efficiency and you won’t even have to worry about
people and what they are thinking.
Take on what you can handle
A good way to avoid making excuses is to be upfront about your capabilities
right at the beginning. For example, if you have been asked to head a major
project at work and you feel you can’t handle it or need more time or manpower,
say so at the start of the project. This way later if the project fails or
something goes wrong, it won’t be your fault and you won’t have to think up
reasons to avoid taking the blame. So just be upfront about what you can and
cannot do.
Don’t whine
Another thing common with people who make excuses is that they are constantly
complaining about other things and people. The reason the ‘excuser’ does this is
because blaming someone else is the best and easiest excuse in the world. But it
might just come to haunt you, because eventually people will realise that you’re
just a shirker who only knows how to pass the buck.
Keep sorry simple
Learn to say you’re sorry without launching into a long-winded explanation. The
reasons why your report was late don’t matter. If you forgot your wedding
anniversary, apologise without hiding behind fictitious reasons. Challenge
yourself to eliminate extraneous excuses.
Open to criticism
Another common trait of people who are in the habit of making excuses is that
they can’t handle criticism of any kind. You need to understand that there is
such a thing as constructive criticism and it can help you improve. Yes, if
someone is unnecessarily giving you a tough time, you don’t have to put up with
it. But, a little criticism can be good for you.
The friend system
Make a pact with a friend or colleague who has the same problem of making
excuses. Agree to point it out if you see him or her regressing to their old
ways, and have them commit to doing the same.
Be solution oriented
Invest your energy into finding solutions instead of creating justifications. If
you need to, you can even seek help from a professional or attend a seminar.
Making excuses all the time will not bring you success. Try to give results
rather than excuses and both your personal and professional life will improve.